You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
