question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
