Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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