i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize