The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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