I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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