PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I am midnight drunk by noon
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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