guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I FOUND THE LEGS
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
