i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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