is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
