Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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