out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Come see our sink grown plant.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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