I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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