he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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