You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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