Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
