We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
