the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
