Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
did you just send me my own nude
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
