seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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