I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
