Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
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