Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
