Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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