my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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