i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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