We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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