Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
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This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
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Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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