so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
