i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
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