Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize