I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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