Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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