so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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