you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize
