Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
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And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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