oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about my life...
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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