Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
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