i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
so let's talk penis.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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