Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
