dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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