I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize