yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
