On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
