dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
