I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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