the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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