Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
