I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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