those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
This is the high leading the old right now
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize